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The gap between our income and ego

Is money linked to our ego? It’s a question that invites us to reflect on the deeper motivations behind our financial decisions. Morgan Housel, in his thought-provoking way, suggests that “savings is the gap between your income and your ego.” 

This statement can be confronting, especially because it challenges us to consider the extent to which our financial behaviours are driven by a desire to maintain or enhance our sense of self-worth. While Housel’s observation holds some truth, it’s important to recognise that the relationship between money, ego, and personal fulfilment is far more nuanced than it first appears.

At first glance, the idea of adopting a low-ego, high-humility approach to wealth-building might seem like the most logical path. The reasoning is simple: by curbing spending driven by ego and instead focusing on saving and investing, we can accelerate our journey toward financial independence. This approach, however, can sometimes feel overly simplistic. It suggests that ego is inherently detrimental to financial success and overlooks the complex ways in which our values, purpose, and sense of fulfilment intersect with our spending choices.

For many, spending isn’t merely about satisfying an inflated sense of self-worth. It’s deeply intertwined with values, purpose, and the pursuit of personal fulfilment. Consider, for example, someone who chooses to invest in high-quality experiences or products—not to showcase their wealth, but because these choices align with their core values or bring them a deep sense of joy and meaning. In such cases, spending is not just about ego; it’s about living in alignment with what truly matters to them.

This brings us to the essential concept of balance. Financial independence isn’t just about cutting expenses to the bone or maximising wealth accumulation. It’s about ensuring that our financial decisions reflect both our personal values and long-term goals. When our spending is aligned with what we value most, money becomes more than just a means to an end; it becomes a tool that helps us lead a life filled with purpose and fulfilment. It’s not about living frugally for the sake of frugality, but about making intentional choices that serve our deeper aspirations.

This balance is critical because it acknowledges that wealth and fulfilment are not mutually exclusive. It’s possible to spend on things that matter to us—whether it’s on quality, experiences, or passions—without compromising our long-term financial goals. This requires a strategic financial plan that accounts for these intentional choices, allowing us to enjoy the fruits of our labour while still securing our financial future.

Understanding the link between money and ego is part of a larger journey toward self-awareness and intentional living. It invites us to examine where ego may be driving our financial decisions and where our spending truly reflects what we value most. By doing this inner work, we can create a financial plan that doesn’t just aim for wealth accumulation but also for a life that feels rich in purpose and fulfilment. In this way, money serves its highest purpose—supporting a well-lived life with balance, intention, and clarity.

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All behaviour is communication

Have you ever paused to consider what your behaviour might be saying about you… to you? It’s a fascinating thought, isn’t it? All behaviour is a form of communication. Every action we take, every choice we make, sends a message, not only to the world around us but also to ourselves.

In the realm of financial planning, this idea becomes particularly intriguing. What are our financial behaviours trying to tell us?

Think about it. When you splurge on an expensive item, what is that behaviour communicating? Perhaps it’s a statement about your desire for status, or maybe it’s about seeking comfort in material things during stressful times, or perhaps it’s your ability to reward yourself and invest in self-care.

When you diligently save a portion of your income each month, what message does that send? It could be a testament to your commitment to future security or a reflection of your values around financial responsibility.

In many ways, our financial behaviours are deeply tied to our identities, our fears, and our dreams. They reveal what we value, what we aspire to, and what we are afraid of. By paying attention to these behaviours, we can gain profound insights into ourselves and use that understanding to shape a more fulfilling financial future.

Take, for example, the act of budgeting. On the surface, it might seem like a dry, technical task—allocating numbers into categories. But look a little deeper, and you’ll see that budgeting is a powerful form of self-communication. It’s you telling yourself that your financial goals are important, that you are capable of managing your resources wisely, and that you have the discipline to follow through on your plans.

Or consider the behaviour of investing. Investing is more than just a strategy to grow your wealth. It’s a statement of faith in the future. It’s you saying, “I believe that my money can work for me, and I trust that the world will continue to provide opportunities for growth.” This behaviour communicates optimism, courage, and a proactive mindset.

Even the way we handle financial setbacks speaks volumes. When faced with an unexpected expense or a market downturn, our reactions can reveal our resilience, our ability to adapt, and our level of emotional intelligence. Do we panic and make impulsive decisions, or do we stay calm and think strategically about our next steps? Each response is a form of communication that reflects our inner strength and our capacity for growth.

The beauty of recognising that all behaviour is communication is that it empowers us to change. We can rewrite the script once we understand the messages our financial behaviours are sending. If we notice that our spending habits communicate a need for emotional comfort, we can find healthier ways to address that need. If we see that our reluctance to save is rooted in a fear of scarcity, we can work on cultivating a mindset of abundance and security.

In this journey of self-discovery and growth, it’s important to remember that we don’t have to do it alone. Just as our behaviours communicate messages to ourselves, they also communicate to those around us—our family, our friends, our financial advisors. By sharing our insights and working together, we can support each other in making positive changes and achieving our financial goals.

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Problems that seem simple at first

Life’s a bit of a puzzle, isn’t it? We look at our problems and think, “Oh, that’s straightforward enough.” But then we start digging, and suddenly we’re in a whole different ballgame. It’s like peeling an onion – layer after layer, each revealing something new. And you know what? There’s a reason for all this complexity – and it’s not just to bring tears to our eyes… 

Most of the time, the issues we’re facing are just the tip of the iceberg, hinting at bigger stuff going on beneath the surface. It’s all connected – our physical health, our state of mind, our spiritual well-being, and how we relate to others. It’s a big, interconnected web, and each thread tells a story.

Remember that scene in Shrek where Shrek tells Donkey that ogres are like onions because they have layers? Well, our problems are a lot like that. On the surface, they seem simple, much like Shrek and Donkey’s initial plan to have the squatters removed from Shrek’s land by Lord Farquaad. They thought it would be a quick, straightforward trip. But as their journey unfolds, it turns into a grand adventure with unexpected twists and deeper revelations.

Similarly, as we peel back each layer of our problems, we discover more about ourselves and the underlying issues at play. This complexity isn’t just a hassle; it’s a clue to understanding the bigger picture of our lives. Just like Shrek and Donkey’s journey, our path might be longer and more intricate than we initially thought, but each layer we uncover brings us closer to true understanding and resolution.

Imagine you have a financial issue that initially appears straightforward, like an unexpected expense. At first glance, it’s a matter of finding the money to cover it. But as you delve deeper, you might uncover layers of underlying concerns: stress about financial stability, feelings of inadequacy, or even relationship tensions stemming from money management.

When we acknowledge these deeper connections, the landscape of our problems shifts, they are no longer isolated incidents but part of a larger, intricate web of our lives. This realisation can be overwhelming, but it also opens up a pathway to true understanding and growth.

So, the philosophical question remains: How do we begin to unwrap the deeper layers? The answer lies in being aware that our problems are interconnected threads woven into our broader life story. By engaging in open, honest conversations with those we trust, we gain the strength and clarity to address these issues holistically.

Having people to talk to when we face problems is not a sign of weakness; it’s a testament to our relational strength. It’s an acknowledgment that we don’t have to navigate this complex maze alone. Speaking to a trusted partner, friend, or advisor provides us with new perspectives and shared wisdom, illuminating aspects of the problem we might have missed.

Carl Richards often illustrates complex financial concepts with simple sketches, reminding us that clarity often emerges from simplicity. In the same vein, reaching out for help can simplify the complexities we face, breaking them down into manageable steps.

Don’t be afraid to tap into your support network. Speak to a trusted partner, friend, or advisor. Their insights can help you untangle the complexities and guide you toward meaningful solutions. Remember, it’s through these connections and the commitment to diving deeper that we find more meaning and experience fulfillment.

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The art of switching off

What if the key to unlocking a richer, more fulfilling life lies not in doing more, but in doing less? In our hyper-connected world, where the lines between work and personal life are increasingly blurred, this question has never been more relevant.

The older we get, the more we see and learn how burnout can impact not just our emotional well-being, but our relationships and finances too. The constant pressure to be “on” can lead to poor decision-making, strained personal connections, and even financial missteps.

But here’s the good news: creating an intentional switch-off routine can be a game-changer. Just as we carefully plan our financial strategies, we need to design our daily routines with equal thoughtfulness.

Imagine ending our workday with a ritual that clearly signals to our brains that it’s time to shift gears. It could be as simple as playing a specific song, changing our shoes, or taking a few minutes to meditate. The key is consistency – making it a habit that sticks.

This isn’t just about work-life balance; it’s about life-wealth balance. When we’re constantly in work mode, we’re more likely to make impulsive financial decisions, overlook important personal relationships, and neglect self-care. All of these can have a significant impact on our overall financial well-being.

Consider this: How often have we made unnecessary purchases because we were too stressed or tired to think clearly? How many times have we missed out on quality time with loved ones because we were mentally still at work? These seemingly small moments add up, affecting both our emotional and financial health.

By creating a clear boundary between work and personal time, we give ourselves the space to recharge, reconnect with our values, and make more mindful decisions – financial and otherwise.

Remember the wise words of Anne Lamott: “Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes, including you.”

So, let’s circle back to our original question: What if the key to a richer life is in doing less? After exploring the benefits of intentional unplugging, we believe the answer is a resounding yes. By giving ourselves permission to switch off, we’re not just avoiding burnout – we’re investing in our overall well-being, our relationships, and ultimately, our financial future.

Our wealth isn’t just about the numbers in our bank accounts. It’s about creating lives rich in experiences, relationships, and personal fulfilment. And sometimes, the best way to grow that wealth is to simply unplug.

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Pause before you pay (part II)

ENHANCING FINANCIAL WISDOM: FROM PRICE COMPARISON TO SPENDING AWARENESS

The simple act of pausing before making a financial commitment can transform your budget and savings strategy, echoing the thoughtful approach advocated by Benjamin Franklin: “Beware of little expenses; a small leak will sink a great ship.”

Taking a moment to think before you buy significantly encourages better spending decisions. This brief pause allows you the opportunity to conduct a quick search for better prices or alternative products. It could mean checking other retailers for a better deal or waiting for a sale period to make the purchase. 

This approach not only saves money but ensures you are making the best possible decision with your financial resources. By not rushing into a purchase, you give yourself the chance to explore all available options and potentially find a more cost-effective solution.

Regular pauses also heighten your consciousness about where your money is going. This increased awareness can reveal patterns in your spending, such as frequent indulgences in luxury items or unnecessary gadgets. Recognising these patterns allows you to adjust your spending habits to better fit your financial goals, ensuring that your money is spent in ways that truly matter to you. 

By understanding where your money frequently goes, you can identify areas where you might be overspending and make the necessary adjustments to align your expenditures with your financial objectives.

Moreover, taking a moment to reflect before spending promotes a more mindful relationship with money. 

Understanding the flow of your finances and recognising the impact of each transaction encourages a more measured and deliberate approach to consumption. As Maya Angelou eloquently put it, “I’ve learned that making a ‘living’ is not the same thing as ‘making a life.'” This insight underscores the importance of thoughtful spending, where each decision is made with consideration and intent. When you pause to consider a purchase, you are not only thinking about the immediate satisfaction but also how it fits into your broader life goals and values.

Incorporating these practices into your daily life not only improves your immediate financial situation but also sets a foundation for long-term financial health and wisdom. By pausing before each purchase, you ensure that your financial decisions are thoughtful, deliberate, and aligned with your ultimate life goals.

This mindful approach to spending helps build a more secure and fulfilling financial future. Each pause is a step towards financial prudence, reinforcing a disciplined approach that can lead to greater financial stability and peace of mind.

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The Truth Fairy

Once upon a time, in a land not so far away, there lived a magical creature known as the Retirement Fairy. This benevolent being was said to wave its wand and miraculously transform meagre savings into bountiful nest eggs, rescuing procrastinators and under-savers from financial distress in their golden years.

It’s a comforting tale, isn’t it? Unfortunately, like most fairy tales, it’s just that – a story. Yet, surprisingly, many adults seem to believe in this financial folklore more fervently than children believe in the Tooth Fairy.

Enter the Truth Fairy, with a reality check – a truth bomb, if you will. The Truth Fairy doesn’t deal in fantasies but in the hard, undeniable facts about achieving financial independence. The truth is, there are no magical solutions or shortcuts when it comes to securing your financial future. It requires consistent effort, wise planning, and sometimes making tough choices.

On top of this, traditional understandings of retirement have changed. Financial independence is attainable, but it demands proactive, informed decision-making and a commitment to saving and investing wisely. So, let’s shatter the myth of the Retirement Fairy and embrace the truth. Let’s face the truth and take control of our financial destinies.

The truth is, starting to invest early is EVERYTHING when it comes to securing a comfortable retirement. The power of compound interest – often called the eighth wonder of the world – works its magic over decades, not months or years. Waiting until you’re 40 or older to start seriously saving for retirement is like showing up to a marathon when it’s almost over and expecting to win.

But here’s the good news: You don’t need a fairy to create a secure financial future. You have something far more powerful – yourself. You are the architect of your own destiny, and with the right knowledge, tools, and mindset, you can build a financially independent future that’s not just comfortable, but truly fulfilling.

Here are some steps to start taking control of your financial future today:

  1. Start now, no matter your age. The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.
  1. Educate yourself about personal finance. Knowledge is power when it comes to managing your money.
  1. Create a budget and stick to it. Understanding your cash flow is crucial for effective saving and investing.
  1. Maximise your retirement savings. Take full advantage of any tax-advantaged retirement savings options available in your country.
  1. Diversify your investments. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.
  1. Regularly review and adjust your financial plan. Your needs and goals will change over time, and your plan should reflect that.
  1. Seek professional advice. A financial planner can provide valuable guidance tailored to your specific situation.

Remember, building a secure financial future isn’t about waiting for a magical solution. It’s about making consistent, informed decisions over time. It’s about understanding that small actions today can have a significant impact on your future.

So, let’s put the Retirement Fairy tale to bed once and for all. Instead of waiting for a mythical being to solve your financial challenges, embrace your role as the hero of your own financial story. Be proactive, be informed, and be consistent. Your future self will thank you for it.

After all, the only real magic in personal finance is the power of compound interest combined with time and discipline. And that’s a kind of magic we can all believe in.

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Pause before you pay (part I)

THE ART OF MINDFUL SPENDING: HOW TO COMBAT IMPULSE BUYING

In the rush of daily life, the urge to make spontaneous purchases can be compelling. Yet, giving in to this impulse often leads to clutter, not just in our homes but in our financial lives as well. 

Warren Buffett wisely advised, “If you buy things you do not need, soon you will have to sell things you need.” This caution speaks volumes about the value of pausing before making a purchase.

Preventing Impulse Buys

The first benefit of taking a moment before reaching for your wallet is the opportunity to question the necessity of a purchase. Is this item something you’ve been planning to buy, or is it just a momentary desire triggered by clever marketing or fleeting emotions? Stopping to reflect can help you avoid the quick thrill of impulse buying, which often fades into regret.

Alignment with Financial Goals

Every purchase or investment you make has the potential to either advance or detract from your financial goals. This makes pausing before a purchase not just prudent, but essential. 

Ask yourself: Does this purchase align with my long-term aspirations? For instance, if your goal is to travel more, weigh the immediate satisfaction of a new outfit against the enduring memories and pleasure of a future trip. 

Beyond typical savings, consider diverse investment avenues as well. Investing in stocks might offer potential returns and liquidity, but alternative investments like art could align with personal passions and provide aesthetic enjoyment while still appreciating in value over time. 

As Oprah Winfrey insightfully remarked, “Do the one thing you think you cannot do. Fail at it. Try again. Do better the second time.” This philosophy encourages not just thoughtful spending but also daring and diversifying your investment choices, pushing you to explore options beyond the conventional, thereby broadening your financial horizon and potentially enriching your personal and financial growth.

Reduces Buyer’s Remorse

Nothing is more frustrating than purchasing something only to realise it wasn’t necessary, or it doesn’t bring the joy you expected. By pausing, you give yourself the chance to really think about how much you’ll use the item and whether it’s worth the cost. This mindfulness can significantly decrease the likelihood of buyer’s remorse.

By adopting a mindful approach to spending, not only do you save money, but you also ensure that your purchases bring real value and joy into your life. This practice of pausing helps cultivate a deeper understanding of your financial habits and fosters a more intentional lifestyle.

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The Monte Carlo Fallacy

Also known as the gambler’s fallacy, the Monte Carlo fallacy is the mistaken belief that past events can influence future outcomes in situations where the events are actually independent. This fallacy, or cognitive bias, originates from the world of gambling, where players may erroneously believe that a streak of losses makes a win more likely or vice versa.

In reality, each spin of the roulette wheel or roll of the dice is an independent event, unaffected by what happened before. The odds remain the same, regardless of previous outcomes. However, our minds struggle with this concept, often seeking patterns and meaning where none exist.

In the realm of financial planning, making sound decisions is crucial for long-term success and well-being. However, our minds are not always as rational as we might hope, and we can tag onto patterns that aren’t accurate. Cognitive biases, such as the gambler’s fallacy, can subtly influence our planning processes and lead us astray.

This cognitive bias can manifest in various ways in our financial lives. For example, an investor who has experienced a series of losses may believe that they are “due” for a win, leading them to make riskier investments or to hold onto losing positions longer than they should. Conversely, an investor who has had a streak of success may become overconfident, believing that their past performance guarantees future results.

The gambler’s fallacy can also influence our perception of market trends. If the stock market has been on a prolonged bull run, some investors may believe that a downturn is imminent, causing them to sell off their positions prematurely. Similarly, if the market has experienced a significant drop, some may hesitate to invest, believing that further losses are inevitable.

So, how can we guard against the influence of the gambler’s fallacy in our financial decision-making? Here are a few strategies to consider:

1. Understand the independence of events:
Remind yourself that past performance does not guarantee future results. Each investment decision should be evaluated on its own merits, based on current market conditions and your personal financial goals.

2. Consider data and analysis:
Rather than making decisions based on gut feelings or hunches, ground your financial choices in solid research and data. Consult with a financial planner who can provide objective insights and help you maintain a long-term perspective.

3. Embrace a diversified portfolio:
By spreading your investments across a range of asset classes and sectors, you can help mitigate the impact of short-term market fluctuations and reduce the temptation to make reactionary decisions based on recent performance.

4. Check in with yourself:
When making financial decisions, take a moment to check in with yourself. What emotional factors or cognitive biases are influencing you? By bringing awareness to your thought processes and feelings, you can make more clear-headed, healthy choices.

5. Maintain a long-term outlook:
Remember that successful financial planning is a marathon, not a sprint. Short-term market movements, whether positive or negative, are less important than your overall trajectory. Stay focused on your long-term goals and resist the urge to make impulsive decisions based on recent events.

The gambler’s fallacy is just one of many cognitive biases that can impact our financial choices. By understanding these biases and actively working to counteract them, we can make more informed, level-headed decisions about our money.

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It ain’t gonna be easy

The road toward financial independence and a meaningful life is seldom straight or smooth. It’s a path fraught with challenges, requiring not just financial acumen but also a steadfast commitment to your long-term goals. The words, “I’m not telling you it’s going to be easy. I’m telling you it’s going to be worth it,” resonate deeply in this context, offering both a sobering reminder and a hopeful promise.

It ain’t gonna be easy. Embarking on this journey means embracing complexity and uncertainty—not just occasionally, but as constant companions. Planning and building a life of value isn’t merely about making more money or saving aggressively, though these are undoubtedly crucial components.

It’s about crafting a life that aligns with your deepest values and aspirations, a life where money serves not as the end goal but as a tool for crafting a richer, more fulfilling existence.

The challenges are manifold and requires a disciplined approach to investment in ourselves and our futures, where strategic patience is more than a virtue—it’s a necessity. Each decision must be weighed not only for its potential return but for its alignment with broader life goals.

Moreover, the journey involves constant education and re-education. This learning curve can be steep, but it’s also enriching—an opportunity to deepen your understanding not only of finance but of your personal relationship with money.

However, the true value of this journey lies in its transformative power. Financial independence isn’t just about securing enough assets to live comfortably—it’s about gaining the freedom to pursue your passions without financial constraints. It’s about the peace of mind that comes from knowing you can weather financial storms. It’s about the ability to provide for loved ones and the capacity to give generously to causes that matter to you.

This path also teaches resilience and resourcefulness. You’ll learn to craft budgets that reflect your priorities, invest in ways that mirror your risk tolerance and ethical beliefs, and pivot your strategies in response to life’s inevitable changes. Each step, each decision, is a building block in creating a stable and robust financial foundation.

The Art Williams quote – “I’m not telling you it’s going to be easy. I’m telling you it’s going to be worth it,” serves as a beacon for anyone embarking on or navigating the path to financial independence. It acknowledges the hardships and the hurdles but also illuminates the profound rewards that lie beyond them. When the going gets tough—as it invariably will—these words remind us to look beyond the immediate difficulties to the long-term benefits.

Ultimately, the journey towards financial independence is as much about cultivating personal virtues—patience, perseverance, and foresight—as it is about accumulating wealth.

It’s a testament to the fact that the most significant investments you make are not just in your portfolio, but in yourself. And indeed, while the journey may not be easy, it promises to be immensely worth it.

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Being kind to the inner critic

Sometimes, we can be hardest on ourselves (and others) when working with money! This could be because we’ve been taught to think that our success is largely determined and defined by numbers, investment strategies, and external factors that impact our financial well-being. However, true financial success is most often rooted in our internal world—our thoughts, beliefs, and the narratives we tell ourselves. So – it’s a much bigger picture.

As we begin to explore this bigger picture, one of the most significant obstacles to financial and emotional well-being is the presence of a harsh inner critic. This internal voice, formed during childhood, can fill our minds with self-doubt, negativity, and a sense of inadequacy. As we grow older, this inner critic can become more pronounced, influencing our financial decisions and hindering our ability to lead fulfilling lives.

The inner critic can manifest in various ways when it comes to our financial lives. It might tell us that we’re not good enough with money, that we’ll never be able to save enough for retirement, or that we don’t deserve financial success. These thoughts can lead to feelings of anxiety, shame, and even paralysis when it comes to making important financial decisions.

The key to overcoming the inner critic lies in developing a more compassionate and kinder relationship with ourselves. This involves telling ourselves that our worth is not tied to our financial status and that setbacks and challenges are a normal part of the journey.

So, how can we begin to silence our inner critic and cultivate greater self-compassion in our financial lives? Here are a few strategies to consider:

1. Practice mindfulness:
Take time each day to observe your thoughts without judgment. When you notice your inner critic arising, acknowledge its presence and then gently redirect your focus to the present moment.

2. Reframe negative self-talk:
When you catch yourself engaging in negative self-talk about your financial situation, try to reframe those thoughts in a more balanced, compassionate way. For example, instead of telling yourself, “I’ll never get out of debt,” try, “I’m taking steps to improve my financial health, and I’m making progress every day.”

3. Celebrate your successes:
Often, our inner critic can cause us to overlook our financial wins, no matter how small. Make a point of celebrating your successes, whether it’s paying off a credit card or sticking to your budget for a month.

4. Seek support:
Surround yourself with people who uplift and encourage you, whether it’s friends, family, or a financial planner who takes a holistic, client-centric approach. Having a supportive network will help counteract the negative influence of your inner critic.

5. Practice self-care:
Engage in activities that promote your overall well-being, such as exercise, hobbies, or spending time in nature. When we take care of ourselves holistically, we’re better equipped to manage stress and maintain a positive outlook.

The ultimate goal of financial planning is not just to accumulate wealth, but to create a life that is rich in purpose, meaning, and fulfilment. By learning to silence our inner critic and approach our financial lives with greater self-compassion, we open ourselves up to a more joyful, abundant existence.

Remember, the journey to financial and emotional well-being is not always a straight line. There will be ups and downs, successes and setbacks. What matters most is how we choose to relate to ourselves along the way. By cultivating a kinder, more compassionate inner dialogue, we create the foundation for a financial life that is truly aligned with our deepest values and aspirations.

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