The Ballad of Golden Means

In sooth, a tale of coin oft told,
Doth shake the hearts of young and old;
For lucre’s siren song entwines
The very core of mortal lines.

Yet, shall we to this master bow?
Or find we balance ‘twixt the bough?
In measure fair and wisdom’s sight,
Let not the gold our souls indict.

For though the purse may fill with glee,
’Tis but a shadow’s feign’d decree.
A full heart needs not excess,
But thrives in love’s simple caress.

Hark! Wise Shakespeare’s quill doth spin,
“Neither a borrower nor a lender be;”
For richness found in peace within,
Outweighs the chest of treasury.

This sonnet, inspired by the timeless musings of the Bard of Avon, illuminates the complex relationship humanity has with money. Shakespeare himself often peppered his works with financial wisdom, understanding that money, while a necessary player in the theatre of life, should never overtake the essence of human experience.

Here are some of the greats…

“Timon of Athens”

One of Shakespeare’s lesser-known plays, “Timon of Athens,” is a cautionary tale about wealth, generosity, and ingratitude. Timon, a wealthy Athenian, lavishes his fortune on parasitic friends. When his wealth evaporates, so does their loyalty, and Timon is left destitute and embittered. The play speaks to the dangers of tying one’s identity too closely to wealth and the fickle nature of friends won by money.

“The Merchant of Venice”

This play is rich with monetary themes, most famously in the storyline involving Shylock, the Jewish moneylender, and Antonio, the titular merchant. The bond between them, which involves a pound of Antonio’s flesh as collateral for a loan, reflects on the peril of debt and the complexities of business ethics. Through the characters’ dealings, Shakespeare contemplates the value of mercy over material wealth, as well as the cost of human life against monetary debt.

“Hamlet”

In “Hamlet,” Polonius gives his son Laertes a litany of advice, including the oft-quoted financial counsel: “Neither a borrower nor a lender be; For loan oft loses both itself and friend.” This nugget of wisdom warns of the personal and financial perils of mixing money with relationships.

“King Lear”

In “King Lear,” we see a tragedy unfold around wealth, power, and family. Lear’s decision to divide his kingdom based on his daughters’ professions of love speaks to the folly of equating monetary gain with genuine affection and loyalty. The play ultimately reveals the emptiness of wealth without the foundation of true human bonds.

We open our sonnet above by recognising money’s powerful role, acknowledging its potential to captivate both the youth in their naivety and the elders in their reflection. Yet, it challenges us to question its sovereignty, urging a balance that can be found “’twixt the bough,” an allegory for life’s myriad offerings beyond the financial realm.

The third quatrain cautions against the illusion that happiness is synonymous with wealth. True contentment is not found in the abundance of possessions but rather in the intangible richness of love and connection.

Echoing Polonius’s advice to Laertes in “Hamlet,” the couplet serves as a moral compass, guiding us towards inner peace and self-reliance rather than the uncertainty of debt and dependence. It’s a call to value our internal wealth over external riches.

In contemporary terms, this poetic reflection serves as a reminder that while financial security is important, it is but one facet of a fulfilling life. Our financial pursuits should not consume us to the point of overshadowing the other aspects of our existence – relationships, passions, and inner peace. The greatest wealth we can accumulate is the richness of a well-lived life, balanced in means and rich in purpose.

The concept of ‘enough’ remains as elusive as the horizon — always visible yet forever just out of reach. This is particularly true in our relationship with money, a relationship that often mirrors the depths of human desire and the complexities of contentment.

The nature of enough is a philosophical rabbit hole. On the one hand, it is an acknowledgement of sufficiency, a nod to the point where need and provision are in harmony. Yet, paradoxically, it is also the starting line for more — a restless starting block from which we sprint after the next financial milestone. The notion of having ‘enough’ money is bound by personal context, subject to the shifting sands of life’s circumstances and societal benchmarks.

In a culture where success is frequently measured by material accumulation, ‘more’ is an endless call, luring us with promises of security, happiness, and status. But as philosopher Epicurus pointed out, “Nothing is enough for the man to whom enough is too little.”

This insatiability is deeply woven into the fabric of our economic system, which thrives on continuous growth and consumption. Yet, this perpetual hunger for more often leads to a cycle of endless pursuit, where satisfaction is a moving target, always just beyond the next paycheck or purchase.

The stoics, on the other hand, teach us about ataraxia — a state of serene calmness, a contentment that comes not from external acquisitions but from inner peace and the wisdom of knowing what is truly necessary. Seneca, a stoic philosopher, cautioned against allowing fortune to dictate happiness, suggesting that wealth is not one of the good things but a ‘neutral’ thing, a tool whose value is determined by its use.

What, then, if we reframe our perception of ‘enough’? What if enough isn’t a number in a bank account but a mindset, a perspective that allows us to find contentment in the present while still fostering ambitions for the future? This balance is not found in passive resignation but in active gratitude, a nuanced understanding that while we strive for more, we also celebrate what is.

In this light, the statement “we’ll never have enough” can transform from a sentence of eternal dissatisfaction to a recognition of life’s boundless possibilities. It’s not a curse of perpetual lack, but an invitation to ongoing growth, learning, and experience. It’s an acknowledgement that the richness of life is not solely contained within the confines of financial wealth.

The truth is, there will always be more money to earn, just as there will always be more life to live, more love to give, and more wisdom to gain. In recognising that ‘enough’ is a fluid concept, we might find that our lives are fuller than we realised — not with the clutter of possessions, but with the things that truly enrich us: relationships, experiences, and the joys of a life well-lived.

In the end, perhaps it’s not about having ‘enough’ money, but about having enough of what money can’t buy. The art, then, is not only in the earning but in the art of discerning — figuring out what enough means for us and adjusting our sails accordingly on the vast ocean of life.

Our daily existence is a series of patterns and habits, some as visible as the paths we walk, others as intimate as the thoughts we entertain. Within this daily walk, each choice of habit — whether tied to our finances, our health, or our personal growth — has the potential to either constrain or liberate us. Recognising and nurturing these patterns is akin to tending a garden; it requires patience, attention, and a willingness to nurture growth over time.

The interplay of habits and health is a dance of cause and effect, where the steps we take can either lead us to flourishing or faltering — and this includes our financial well-being. Every financial decision is a droplet that ripples across the pond of our lives, affecting not just our bank balances but our stress levels, our health, and our capacity for healing and growth.

In the realm of finance, habits can often become unexamined rituals. We earn, we spend, we save — sometimes mechanically, often emotionally. Yet, if we pause to examine these patterns, to understand the why behind the what, we begin to wield our habits with intention. Building financial patterns that align with our life’s goals is akin to training muscles; it takes consistent effort and the right techniques. Just as we would consult a fitness coach to sculpt our physical form, working with a financial coach can help us to shape our economic behaviours towards health and prosperity.

The patterns we build around money influence not just our fiscal fitness but resonate through our mental and emotional health. Financial stress can fray the nerves and fog the mind, while financial stability often provides the foundation for growth and the space for healing. The cultivation of positive financial habits — regular saving, prudent investing, mindful spending — can therefore be seen as a form of self-care, a reinforcement of our psychological and emotional well-being.

But how do we transform these concepts into concrete habits? It begins with awareness. Like mindfulness in meditation, being conscious of our financial behaviours helps us to detect the patterns that serve us and those that sabotage us. Once identified, we can intentionally reinforce the positive patterns with repetition and reward, forging new neural pathways that make healthy financial habits second nature.

Simultaneously, the journey towards health and healing is deeply personal, and what constitutes growth for one may be maintenance for another. It’s important to remember that our financial paths are equally individual. The patterns we cultivate must resonate with our values and our unique life situations. This is where the coaching aspect enters — a good financial adviser doesn’t impose a one-size-fits-all regimen but rather helps to tailor a plan that fits the fabric of one’s life, adjusting as circumstances evolve.

It’s all about creating a flexible, dynamic system of habits that support our overall well-being. Just as we would nurture our bodies and minds with good nutrition and positive thoughts, we must tend to our financial habits with care. They are the roots from which our dreams and goals draw sustenance, the patterns upon which the canvas of our lives is stretched. By aligning our financial practices with our quest for a healthy and fulfilling life, we practice a pattern of prosperity that can hold us steady through all of life’s seasons.

We’ve all been there: that moment when life throws you a curveball and stress builds up. Your palms might get sweaty, your heart rate spikes, or perhaps you feel a pit in your stomach. But have you ever thought about how this stress manifests in your financial behaviour? Understanding your ‘money stress language’ could be a pivotal factor in achieving comprehensive financial wellness, which is the ultimate aim of integrated, holistic financial planning.

Despite how enlightened we may think we’ve become in the 21st century, we still often think of financial planning in terms of numbers, budgets, and spreadsheets. While these are undoubtedly important, another layer is easy to overlook: our emotional and psychological relationship with money. 

In a previous blog, we discussed how threat, stress, and trauma can influence our financial behaviours. But it’s not just about understanding that these factors exist; it’s about knowing how they specifically affect you. This self-awareness can be a game-changer in terms of aligning your financial decisions with your overall well-being and life goals.

Type A: The Spender

When stress kicks in, some people go on a spending spree. It’s not necessarily about need; it’s about the emotional high that comes from acquiring something new. This temporary rush can mask the stress you’re feeling. However, in the long term, impulsive spending can jeopardise your financial stability and stray you further from your goals. Recognising this pattern is the first step towards making a meaningful change.

Type B: The Saver

Others do the exact opposite. In times of stress, they hoard money, often going to great lengths to cut costs. The act of saving gives them a sense of control when everything else seems chaotic. While saving is generally a positive financial behaviour, excessive frugality can hinder the quality of life and even create tension in relationships.

Type C: The Avoider

Some people detach from their finances altogether when stressed. Bills pile up, unopened, and investment decisions get postponed. The “out of sight, out of mind” approach offers an illusionary escape from stress but usually results in a snowballing financial burden that becomes even more stressful down the line.

Type D: The Analyzer

Then there are those who become hyper-focused on their finances, analysing every number and constantly checking their accounts. This could mean reevaluating investments or incessantly tracking every single expenditure. While being informed is beneficial, over-analysis can lead to decision paralysis and added stress.

Type E: The Sharer

Last but not least, some people tend to seek financial advice from friends or family when stressed. While it’s good to have a support system, remember that not all advice is good, especially regarding complex financial matters.

Understanding your ‘money stress language’ is not just an exercise in self-awareness; it’s an investment in your financial future. When you know how stress affects your financial decisions, you can take proactive steps to counteract these tendencies. Integrated financial planning is not just about growing your wealth; it’s about making sure that wealth contributes to your broader life objectives and emotional well-being.

So, the next time stress rears its head, how will you respond? Who will you call for advice?

Have you ever wondered why some financial decisions are harder to make than others? It’s not always just about the numbers or the facts laid out in a spreadsheet. Deep down, emotions, stress, and even past experiences like threats and trauma play a significant role in how we manage our finances. 

This is incredibly important to acknowledge when crafting a comprehensive strategy to grow your wealth and harmonise it with your broader life goals and emotional well-being.

The Role of Threat in Financial Decisions

Threats don’t have to be life-altering or catastrophic to influence our choices. Even mundane circumstances like unexpected bills or market fluctuations can trigger a sense of threat. In these situations, we instinctively resort to a ‘fight, flight, or freeze’ mode. The way you react depends heavily on your money personality. 

If you’re a ‘saver,’ a financial threat might make you even more conservative, causing you to hoard cash and potentially miss out on investment opportunities. If you’re a ‘spender,’ you might react by buying something luxurious to alleviate the stress, which only compounds the financial strain you’re experiencing.

Stress: More than just a feeling

Stress has a particularly insidious way of affecting our financial judgment. It creates a sense of urgency, leading to impulsive decisions like tapping into savings prematurely or investing in high-risk ventures. 

Stress amplifies the characteristics of our money personality in ways that aren’t always beneficial. In a stressed state, ‘risk-takers’ may make even bolder investment choices, while ‘risk-averse’ individuals might sell off investments at the first sign of trouble, incurring losses that could have been avoided.

The lasting impact of trauma

Trauma differentiates itself from threat and stress by its enduring nature. Financial traumas can be severe, such as bankruptcy or foreclosure, or they can be less obvious, like growing up in a financially unstable household. These experiences imprint themselves on our psyche, shaping our attitudes and behaviours around money for years or even decades. The ‘avoider’ money personality might steer clear of financial planning entirely, fearing a repetition of past traumas. Conversely, those with a ‘money monk’ personality may perceive all financial matters as morally problematic, avoiding investments and maintaining a lifetime of unnecessary frugality.

Building financial resilience: Five Guiding Principles

Even though threat, stress, and trauma can strongly hone financial habits, understanding their impact is empowering. Here are five principles to help you build resilience:

Know Thyself: Being aware of your money personality is crucial for recognizing how you might react to different financial scenarios.

Be Adaptable: The ability to change your financial strategies in response to new situations helps you maintain balance, both emotionally and financially.

Lean on Your Network: Whether it’s our relationship, or supportive family and friends, having a solid network can help you weather financial storms.

Plan for the Unexpected: Prepare for financial threats and stressors with a robust safety net and a well-thought-out financial plan.

Mindful Management: Taking care of your mental and emotional health is as important as taking care of your finances. Emotional well-being helps in making balanced, rational decisions.

Understanding the psychological factors that influence your money personality can offer more than just financial benefits; it can improve your overall well-being. When you recognize how threat, stress, and trauma affect your financial choices, you’re better equipped to make decisions that are aligned with both your financial and life goals.