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Rewrite your love story with money

Every relationship has a story—a narrative we tell ourselves about how things are, how they’ve been, and what they’ll always be. And while we often think of “love stories” in the context of romance, there’s another relationship in our lives that deserves just as much attention: our relationship with money.

For many of us, our money story has deep roots. It’s shaped by childhood experiences, societal messages, and personal triumphs or struggles. Maybe your story is one of scarcity, where money always seemed out of reach. Or perhaps it’s one of indulgence, where spending became a way to fill emotional gaps. For some, it’s a tale of avoidance, where money is simply too overwhelming to confront.

But here’s the truth: just like any relationship, your story with money isn’t unchangeable.

You can rewrite it. And you deserve to.

Take a moment to reflect. What is the current narrative you hold about money? Does it serve you? Does it bring you peace, or does it keep you trapped in fear, guilt, or frustration? Recognizing this story is the first step toward rewriting it.

A love story rooted in respect and connection

Rewriting your money story doesn’t mean suddenly becoming a financial expert or flipping a switch to unlimited abundance. It’s about fostering a healthier, more balanced relationship—one built on respect, understanding, and connection.

Start by replacing judgment with curiosity. Instead of berating yourself for past financial decisions, ask what you’ve learned from them. Instead of focusing on what you don’t have, celebrate what you do. Instead of avoiding conversations about money, lean into them with openness and a willingness to grow.

Money, like any other relationship, thrives when it’s treated with care and intention. That might mean setting boundaries (like a budget) or creating space for regular catch-ups (like reviewing your financial goals). It could mean seeking advice from someone you trust, whether that’s a financial planner, partner, or mentor. Most importantly, it means letting go of shame and stepping into empowerment.

Rewriting your money story doesn’t happen overnight, and that’s okay. Like any love story, it’s a journey—a process of understanding, evolving, and building trust. The key is to start.

Imagine what your life would look like if your relationship with money was no longer a source of stress but a foundation of stability and growth. Picture the freedom to align your financial decisions with your values, dreams, and purpose. That’s the new story you can create.

So, how will your next chapter begin? You’re the author of your story with money, and every choice you make is a chance to write something new. Start today—one small change at a time—and create a love story with money that supports the life you truly want.

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Raise a millionaire

Raising financially responsible children who may one day become the next “Millionaire Next Door” is less about complex financial strategies and more about small, intentional lessons woven into everyday life.

It starts with recognising that children learn more from what we do than what we say. If we want them to grow into thoughtful stewards of their wealth, we must first model responsible behaviour ourselves. Showing them how we save, budget, and make spending decisions is far more impactful than a lecture. Whether it’s choosing to cut back on dining out to save for a family vacation or deciding against an impulse purchase, these actions demonstrate the value of patience, planning, and thoughtful decision-making.

Helping children understand the value of money is another foundational step. This often begins with teaching them how to earn their own money. Whether it’s through age-appropriate chores, a part-time job, or even a small entrepreneurial venture, earning money helps them appreciate the effort that goes into building wealth. Once they’ve earned it, guiding them on how to manage it can be just as impactful. Encouraging them to divide their earnings into categories like spending, saving, and giving introduces them to the idea of balance, a concept that will serve them well throughout life.

One of the most important lessons we can teach children is the power of delayed gratification. In today’s world of instant rewards, this skill can set them apart. Helping kids set small savings goals, like saving for a desired toy or gadget, is a tangible way to instil this value. Watching their savings grow and eventually achieve their goal not only builds their patience but also gives them a sense of pride and ownership that far outweighs the fleeting joy of instant purchases.

Money, despite its importance, is often a taboo topic in families. Breaking this silence by having open, age-appropriate conversations about money can make all the difference. Sharing how financial decisions are made, discussing budgeting for everyday expenses, and even talking about past mistakes can provide invaluable lessons. These conversations don’t have to be formal; they can arise naturally, such as while planning for a family trip or reviewing expenses together. The goal is to create a space where children feel comfortable asking questions and learning about finances in a real-world context.

These lessons don’t have to be monumental. Even small, everyday decisions can have a lasting impact. Inviting your child to help plan a grocery budget or discussing how to save for an outing are easy ways to start embedding these principles.

Over time, these small steps create a foundation that not only helps children understand the mechanics of money but also cultivates the confidence to make thoughtful, intentional financial decisions.

Raising the next millionaires is less about wealth itself and more about instilling values like balance, discipline, and intentionality. It’s about helping children understand that money is a tool, not an end goal, and that thoughtful financial habits can lead to both security and fulfilment.

By leading by example and embracing these small teaching moments, we give our children the opportunity to build not just wealth, but a meaningful life. In doing so, we empower them to create their own version of financial success, rooted in the lessons we’ve shared and the values we’ve modeled.

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You can’t steer a parked car

Have you ever tried to steer a parked car? No matter how much you turn the wheel, you’re going nowhere. It’s a simple truth: movement is necessary for progress. Yet, movement without direction can quickly become chaos. The sweet spot lies in finding the balance—moving forward while knowing where you want to go.

In life, as in financial planning, it’s tempting to stay parked. Waiting for the “perfect” moment to act or for all the uncertainties to disappear feels safe. But staying stationary means forfeiting the opportunity to learn, grow, and adjust. On the other hand, jumping into action without clarity can lead to dead ends or costly mistakes.

The key? Begin the journey, even if the destination isn’t crystal clear. Start small—set an achievable goal, create a rough plan, and take that first step. Once you’re in motion, it’s easier to refine your direction. Life is dynamic, and plans should be too. It’s okay if the path changes as long as you’re continually steering toward what matters most.

Financially, this might mean starting to save even if you’re unsure of your retirement target, or paying off a small debt before tackling the larger ones. Personally, it could mean exploring new opportunities or saying yes to a project, even if the final outcome is uncertain. Movement creates momentum, and momentum makes navigating life’s twists and turns possible.

Remember, progress isn’t about perfection. It’s about taking consistent, intentional action. A moving car may not always stay perfectly aligned, but it’s far easier to adjust its course than a car sitting still. Likewise, the direction of your life isn’t set in stone—it’s shaped by every decision, every pivot, and every forward motion.

So, ask yourself: Are you parked, waiting for certainty, or are you moving forward, trusting that you can adjust as you go? Life doesn’t require us to have all the answers before we start.

It simply asks us to begin.

You can’t steer a parked car, but once you’re moving, the possibilities are endless.

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Start small. Start today.

When it comes to financial success, many people fall into the trap of waiting for the “perfect moment” to start. “I’ll save when I earn more,” or “I’ll invest when the markets feel safer,” are common refrains. But here’s the thing: there’s rarely a perfect moment. Success isn’t built on monumental leaps; it’s built on the foundation of small, consistent actions.

Tony Robbins often highlights the power of small steps, reminding us that tiny, intentional changes compound over time to create extraordinary results. And nowhere is this more true than in our financial lives. But why do we so often underestimate the power of starting small?

Why small steps matter

Imagine dropping a single coin into a jar every day. On its own, it seems insignificant. But fast forward a year, and that jar holds not just coins but the evidence of daily discipline, commitment, and growth. Small actions have a way of compounding—not just financially, but emotionally too. They build momentum, create habits, and, most importantly, transform the way we think about progress.

This concept is beautifully illustrated by the idea of compound interest. A modest savings habit, started early and sustained consistently, can grow exponentially over time. Yet, it’s not just about savings or investments. Small steps can be as simple as eliminating one unnecessary expense or automating a small amount to transfer into an investment account. Over time, these small actions build a foundation for financial freedom.

Breaking the “All or Nothing” mindset

One of the biggest barriers to starting small is the belief that it’s not enough. That unless we can save a significant amount or make a large financial change, it’s not worth it. But this “all or nothing” mindset is what keeps so many of us stuck.

The numbers speak for themselves. What matters isn’t the size of the step—it’s the consistency with which it’s taken.

Transforming mindset through action

Starting small isn’t just about the numbers; it’s also about the psychology of progress. Each small win—whether it’s sticking to a budget for a week, rounding up your spending to invest the difference, or reducing your subscriptions—tells your brain, “I can do this.” That sense of accomplishment fuels motivation, creating a positive feedback loop that drives even more progress.

These small actions also have a way of influencing how we feel about money. They can shift us from a scarcity mindset to one of abundance and control. Instead of focusing on what we can’t do, we start seeing what we can do. This mental shift is often the first step toward achieving larger financial goals.

Start Small, Start Today

The beauty of small steps is that you don’t need to wait to start. Reflect on one tiny financial change you could make today. Perhaps it’s rounding up your spending for investments. Maybe it’s setting up an automated transfer to savings. Or it could be as simple as cutting out one small expense that doesn’t add real value to your life.

The key is to begin. Because every small step, taken consistently, leads to a bigger win down the road. Your financial freedom isn’t built on grand gestures or perfect timing—it’s built on the quiet power of small, steady progress.

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Choosing your next step

Do you ever find yourself replaying decisions from your past, wishing you could rewrite the story? It’s easy for our minds to fixate on the paths we didn’t take, the doors that closed, or the moments that feel like they’ve determined everything about our present.

“I missed my chance, and now it’s too late.”

“I shouldn’t have made that decision back then; look where it’s left me.”

“I don’t deserve to move forward because of mistakes I’ve made.”

We often forget that life isn’t a rigid script but a collection of moments, choices, and lessons. When we look back, it’s tempting to connect the dots in a way that feels final—as if every decision we made was written in ink, unchangeable. But in truth, most choices were made with the best knowledge we had at the time. And while it’s easy to dwell on the paths that didn’t pan out, there’s something equally powerful about the paths still open to us.

Maybe some paths are closed—and that’s okay.

It’s true: not every door stays open forever. Some dreams, goals, or ambitions might no longer fit the life you’re living now. And that’s perfectly okay. In fact, it can be freeing to acknowledge this reality.

Author Chris Guillbeau once shared the idea of celebrating closed doors. While society often celebrates stories of people achieving their dreams later in life—like Samuel L. Jackson landing his breakthrough role at 46—it’s important to recognise that not every aspiration follows that trajectory. Some paths do have deadlines. And holding onto an outdated dream can sometimes keep us from fully embracing what’s next.

Maybe you’ve been telling yourself, “One day, I’ll run a marathon,” even though you despise running. Or perhaps you’ve been holding onto the hope of writing a cookbook, even though cooking no longer excites you. Letting go of these paths isn’t a failure—it’s a chance to clear the way for something better aligned with who you are today.

While it’s healthy to accept that some paths might be closed, it’s equally important to remember that many others are wide open. As Bertrand Russell wisely said, “You’re under no obligation to be who you were five minutes ago.” Just because one path is no longer an option doesn’t mean you’ve run out of choices.

In fact, letting go of old goals can create space for new ones. Imagine how much lighter you’d feel if you stopped regretting the past and instead focused on the possibilities ahead. Whether it’s starting a new hobby, taking a class, or shifting your career, the future isn’t set in stone.

It’s shaped by the actions you take today.

Choosing your next step

So, where do you go from here? Start by celebrating the doors that have closed. Each one taught you something, even if it wasn’t the lesson you expected. Then, take a moment to look at the paths still open to you. What excites you? What feels meaningful now—not 10 years ago, but today?

Whatever it is, remember that progress doesn’t require perfection. It just requires one step forward.

Some paths may no longer be an option, but others are waiting for you to take them. The question is: Which one will you choose?

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The pull of pessimism

Why do pessimistic views often sound so convincing? It’s an interesting phenomenon—when someone warns of an impending financial crash, we perk up, nod solemnly, and give their words the weight of wisdom. But when someone speaks of growth, opportunity, or prosperity, it can come across as naive or overly simplistic.

Why is that?

As humans, we are wired to pay attention to potential threats—it’s an ancient survival mechanism. In financial planning, this instinct often plays out as a bias toward pessimism. Warnings of downturns, recessions, and losses feel more urgent and intellectual than optimistic narratives of growth and stability. And while caution has its place, an unchallenged pessimistic mindset can distort our financial decisions and steer us away from opportunities.

Let’s explore how this bias works, why it’s so seductive, and how we can strive for a more balanced perspective when it comes to our financial lives.

Why pessimism sounds smarter

Pessimism appeals to our natural risk aversion. It feels prudent to prepare for the worst, and pessimistic statements often sound more sophisticated because they account for what could go wrong. After all, stories of financial crises like the 2008 meltdown are burned into our collective memory. These narratives resonate deeply, even if the probability of their recurrence remains low in the near term.

But here’s the thing: while a healthy dose of caution is necessary, excessive pessimism leads to paralysis. It convinces us to hoard cash instead of investing. It tells us to avoid risk at all costs, even when opportunities for growth are within reach. It whispers that the system is broken and that any effort to build wealth is futile.

This mindset, though seductive, is ultimately disempowering. It keeps us stuck in fear, disconnected from the opportunities that exist in every market, every economy, and every life stage.

The optimism we miss

By contrast, optimism often gets dismissed as naive or reckless, yet optimism is what drives progress. It’s the belief in growth that propels people to invest, build businesses, and make plans for the future. And while optimism might not grab headlines or spark urgent debates, it holds an essential truth: the long-term trajectory of humanity—and the markets—tends toward growth and innovation.

This is not about blind faith. It’s about evidence. Historically, markets recover from downturns, innovation continues despite setbacks, and life moves forward. Yet, optimism requires patience, and that’s where its magic lies. It’s not a shortcut to success but a commitment to the bigger picture.

Balancing the scales: The power of pragmatism

So, where does this leave us? Should we reject pessimism entirely? Not at all. Pessimism, when tempered with pragmatism, reminds us to manage risks wisely. But a balanced perspective means combining caution with hope, strategy with belief.

When it comes to financial planning, this balance is key. For example:

  • Investing: If we let pessimism dominate, we might avoid investing altogether, missing out on the compounding power of long-term growth. A balanced approach is to diversify investments, manage risks, and stay the course even when markets wobble.
  • Spending and saving: Pessimism might convince us to save every penny for fear of future disasters. Optimism reminds us that life is also for living. The balance lies in mindful spending—prioritising what truly brings joy and aligns with our values.
  • Planning for the future: A pessimist might say, “Why bother planning? Everything is uncertain.” An optimist believes, “I can build something meaningful, even in uncertain times.” The truth lies in crafting a plan that is adaptable, intentional, and rooted in reality.

Adopting a balanced view requires intentional effort. It means questioning the stories we tell ourselves about money, fear, and possibility. It means seeking data to inform decisions rather than relying solely on instinct. Most importantly, it means recognising that optimism isn’t about ignoring challenges; it’s about believing we can navigate them.

Pessimism might sound smarter, but it’s optimism—and action—that builds wealth, both financially and emotionally.

As you reflect on your financial journey, ask yourself: Where am I letting pessimism hold me back? And where can I invite optimism in? Your financial plan doesn’t have to be perfect, but it does need to be brave enough to look beyond fear and into the opportunities that await.

Because in the end, it’s not about being an optimist or a pessimist—it’s about being prepared, intentional, and open to the possibility of a brighter future.

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Curious, not critical

When was the last time you gave yourself the grace to be curious? To pause and ask why, instead of immediately leaping to judgment? In a world that moves fast—where we’re bombarded by expectations, comparisons, and decisions—curiosity is often overshadowed by criticism. 

But what if we could flip the script? What if curiosity became our default setting, especially when it comes to our relationship with money and life?

Here’s the problem with criticism: criticism is quick. 

It jumps to conclusions. It sees what’s wrong and amplifies it. Whether we’re criticising ourselves for not saving enough, not being a better parent, or not understanding things as well as we think we should, that voice in our head can be harsh. It points out every misstep, every perceived failure, and every gap in our financial knowledge.

And it’s not just self-criticism. We can be quick to criticise others, too. Perhaps you’ve judged a partner for overspending, a friend for being overly frugal, or a colleague for their seemingly extravagant lifestyle. Criticism creates distance—it builds walls instead of bridges.

But here’s the thing: criticism doesn’t fix anything. It keeps us stuck in a cycle of blame and shame, making it nearly impossible to move forward with clarity or purpose.

Curiosity, on the other hand, invites understanding. It pauses, leans in, and asks: Why? Why did I make that decision? Why does my partner approach money this way? Why does this particular financial situation make me feel uneasy?

When we approach life—and money—from a place of curiosity, we shift from judgment to exploration. Instead of berating yourself for overspending last month, you might ask: What was going on for me emotionally? Was I stressed, celebrating, or seeking comfort? Instead of criticising a loved one for their financial choices, you might ask: What values or experiences might be influencing their behaviour?

This shift isn’t about excusing poor decisions or ignoring hard truths. It’s about creating the space to understand those decisions and truths on a deeper level. And when we understand, we can make changes—thoughtful, intentional changes that align with our values and goals.

Curiosity in action

Curiosity can transform how we approach financial planning. For example:

  • Instead of saying, “I’m terrible with money,” try asking, “What’s one small thing I can learn or improve today?”
  • Instead of thinking, “I’ll never get out of debt,” ask, “What’s the first step I can take to change this?”
  • Instead of assuming, “My partner just doesn’t care about saving,” consider asking, “What does financial security mean to them?”

This mindset shift can also extend to our conversations with advisors, mentors, and even our families. A curious approach fosters collaboration and openness, paving the way for better communication and more effective problem-solving.

From criticism to connection

Choosing curiosity over criticism isn’t always easy—it requires slowing down, being present, and letting go of the need to be right. But the rewards are profound. Curiosity doesn’t just improve our financial habits; it strengthens our relationships, builds self-compassion, and helps us navigate life’s challenges with grace.

So the next time you find yourself in a critical spiral—whether it’s about money, work, or life in general—pause. Take a breath. And ask a simple, powerful question: Why? You might be surprised by the answers that follow.

In the end, creating space to be curious isn’t just about improving our financial well-being; it’s about nurturing a mindset that sees opportunities for growth and connection in every moment.

And that, perhaps, is the most valuable investment of all.

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The value of your time

When we think about building wealth, running a business, or creating income opportunities, the question of pricing is one we all face. And while it might sound straightforward at first, it’s actually a deeply personal and complex challenge because no two people’s financial situations are exactly alike.

Some professionals lean on qualifications and experience to determine how much they charge for their time. Others may focus on the value they provide to their clients or customers, setting their rates based on the outcomes their work creates rather than the hours they put in. Still, others base their pricing on the minimum they need to earn to meet their personal or family responsibilities each month.

Regardless of the approach, most of these methods anchor themselves to a fundamental equation: time equals money. If you want to earn more, you either charge more per hour or work more hours. But does this equation always serve us well?

The limitations of tying money to time

When you set your income goals based solely on a finite number of hours in the day, you may inadvertently trap yourself. For instance, if you calculate that you need to earn a specific amount per hour to meet your financial goals, you might feel pressure to book more and more hours to increase your income. This might work in the short term, but over time, it can lead to burnout and an unbalanced life.

On the flip side, you could choose to charge more for your time, which could bring in higher earnings without increasing your workload. But even then, there’s only so far you can stretch the “hourly rate” model before you hit another limitation: there are still only 24 hours in a day.

So, maybe the real question isn’t about how much time you have or how much money you need. Instead, it’s about how much value you assign to your time.

A shift in perspective: Valuing time over money

When you start asking yourself, “What is my time worth to me?” rather than “How much money can I earn per hour?” something remarkable happens. You begin to think less about spreadsheets and hourly rates and more about the bigger picture of your life. Your time stops being a currency to trade for money and starts being a resource to invest in your physical, mental, relational, and spiritual well-being.

This shift in perspective allows you to reframe the way you work. Instead of packing your schedule with billable hours, you might choose to focus on activities that bring you fulfillment and long-term benefits. This could mean spending more time with loved ones, nurturing hobbies, or simply resting. It could also mean finding creative ways to increase your income without increasing your working hours, like exploring passive income streams or value-based pricing models.

By taking a step back and reassessing how you value your time, you can build a life and financial plan that feels both meaningful and sustainable. This plan isn’t just about achieving financial success—it’s about creating a balanced and fulfilling life. You can set goals and benchmarks that aren’t tied to market performance or hourly rates but are aligned with your personal values and long-term aspirations.

So, as you consider your own financial journey, ask yourself: How much is your time worth to you? And are you spending it in a way that aligns with the life you want to live? Sometimes, the most valuable investments aren’t financial—they’re the ones we make in ourselves, our relationships, and our well-being.

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Authenticity or attachment

Why do we say yes when we mean no? Why do we say no when deep down we wish we could say yes? These are questions that dig beneath the surface of our everyday choices, revealing the deeper, often hidden stories we tell ourselves.

In his insightful discussions, Dr. Gabor Maté highlights a core conflict many of us experience: we prioritise attachment over authenticity. Whether it’s in our relationships, careers, or even financial decisions, we often avoid being true to ourselves out of fear—fear of rejection, fear of judgment, or fear of losing connection. But at what cost?

Why we struggle with authenticity

At its heart, the struggle between authenticity and attachment is a universal human dilemma. From an early age, we’re conditioned to seek approval and fit in. This often leads to patterns of saying yes to things that don’t serve us, or no to opportunities that could bring growth, all in an effort to maintain connection or avoid conflict.

For example, imagine a friend asking you to lend them money. Deep down, you may feel uncomfortable—perhaps you’ve been burned in the past, or maybe you simply can’t afford to say yes right now. Yet, instead of honouring your boundaries, you agree, worried that saying no might damage the relationship. In that moment, attachment wins over authenticity, and while the relationship might seem intact on the surface, resentment can quietly take root.

The financial stories we tell ourselves

This internal tug-of-war isn’t limited to our personal relationships; it shows up in our financial lives, too. Think about the stories you tell yourself when making spending decisions. Are you buying the luxury car because it aligns with your values, or because you feel pressured to keep up with those around you? Are you saying yes to another family vacation because you truly want to go, or because you fear disappointing your loved ones?

Our financial behaviours often reflect deeper emotional needs—needs for acceptance, security, or self-worth. But when we act out of alignment with our true values, we not only jeopardise our financial goals but also lose sight of what truly matters to us.

The courage to choose authenticity

Choosing authenticity over attachment doesn’t mean abandoning connection or becoming rigid in your boundaries. It means finding a balance where your yes and no come from a place of honesty and alignment with your values. This shift requires self-awareness and the courage to confront the stories you’ve been telling yourself about who you need to be to belong.

Financially, this could look like rethinking your spending habits and asking, “Does this purchase align with my long-term goals, or am I trying to impress others?” It might involve having honest conversations with family members about holiday spending, choosing to prioritise savings over gifts, or setting boundaries when loved ones ask for financial support.

Living the truth of both yes and no

Authenticity doesn’t mean always saying no, just as attachment doesn’t always mean saying yes. It’s about being deliberate with your decisions and understanding the underlying motivations driving them. This practice can create a sense of empowerment—not just in your financial life but in every aspect of your well-being.

Dr. Maté reminds us that authenticity is not about isolating ourselves; it’s about showing up as we truly are, without fear or apology. When we let go of the need for constant approval, we open the door to deeper, more meaningful relationships and a financial life that reflects our true values.

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Healthier benchmarks

WHERE DO YOU ‘THINK’ YOU SHOULD BE?

Reflecting on our progress is something we all do, but often without knowing it. Whether we’re aware of it or not, several times a day, we measure ourselves against something or someone—be it our past self, others, or some societal ideal. Whether it’s consciously deciding to check in on our progress, or doing so unconsciously, benchmarks are always being set. 

These benchmarks could be internal or external, and they serve as a gauge of how well we’re doing. And while there’s a place for both, it’s important to consider where we are dropping our anchor.

Think of yourself as a boat on the open water. You can’t always stay anchored in one spot, but sometimes it’s important to drop anchor for stability. It’s the same with how we measure our progress. We need to set benchmarks that reflect where we’re at in the present, but also allow space for growth and movement. Just like the tide, our progress should be flexible and responsive, not static.

When it comes to growth—whether in your finances, personal life, or career—it’s often healthier to focus on internal benchmarks. Internal benchmarks are the personal standards you set for yourself based on your own values, goals, and aspirations. It’s not about comparing yourself to others, but recognising how far you’ve come. External benchmarks, such as comparing your progress to others, can be helpful for some light perspective, but they can also leave us feeling frustrated or discouraged if we’re not where we “think” we should be.

Take the world of finance as an example. Let’s say you compare the performance of your portfolio against a stock market index or the success of a financial influencer. These external benchmarks are fine for reference, but if you base your sense of success solely on these metrics, it can lead to disheartenment. For someone like Elon Musk or Jeff Bezos, billions in earnings or the sale of a company might be just another day at the office, but for most people, such achievements would be life-changing. If you measure your progress against others’ success, you’re missing the bigger picture of your own journey and unique goals.

Now, think back to the global disruption of the COVID-19 pandemic. If we had only relied on our internal benchmarks, we might have felt overwhelmed by the sudden shift in our lives, believing we weren’t “performing” as expected. But by considering the external context—the worldwide crisis that affected nearly everyone—we were able to adjust our expectations and take stock of how far we’d come despite the challenges.

And let’s not forget how easy it is to be swayed by the success stories we see around us. Social media, news, and even friends and family can present a curated view of success, leaving out the behind-the-scenes struggles, setbacks, and failures. We tend to see the final achievements, not the daily grind it took to get there, which can distort our own sense of progress. It’s important to remember that behind every success story, there’s usually a lot of hard work and resilience that goes unseen.

So, when it comes to measuring your growth, take a step back and remember that a balanced approach is key. Internal benchmarks—those tied to your own personal goals and values—should be your primary reference point. Use external benchmarks as a lighter guide, but don’t let them define your progress. With this approach, you’ll gain a more grounded and fulfilling perspective on how far you’ve come, and more importantly, how far you’re capable of going.

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